Yesterday I had to deliver some supplies to Kenny at his job. When I got there, everyone was across the playground having lunch under a pavilion. There were five guys including Kenny. They all continued eating while Kenny came and helped me unload.
Later that night when we were out to dinner, Kenny said I defended you today.
Oh yeah? What'd you do?
When you were delivering that fabric, Jon said, You better hurry and help her so she doesn't back up too far and get stuck in the mud. I was already walking away and was angry when I said it but I told him you wouldn't come close, she's not stupid.
**The mud was down a small hill and it was clearly visible where the grass ended and the mud started.
I was very thankful that Kenny was confident in my driving skills and that he wasn't passive with other peoples comments about me. It wasn't a big deal what Jon said, but little things build up and continue to persist if you are not consistently aware of them. After Kenny told me this we shared small stories of how we continually have to defend each other. They have never been down right mean comments that we have defended against, but little stereotypes that people have about marriage and the opposite sex. We both have tried hard to not be silent in the little and big moments.
Some examples from the last month:
- I had laryngitis and could barely speak. One of the guys in the office said, "Bet Kenny's loving this. He doesn't come home and have to hear you barking orders at him." My reply, in my hoarse voice, "Kenny never has to come home to me barking orders." Thank you very much.
- There was a free tree that they wanted to give away. Someone asked me if I wanted it, and I told them I don't really care that much about our yard, that was Kenny's area of expertise and they should ask him. Their response, "What's the point, he'll just have to get permission from the misses." "No he wouldn't, I trust him to make his own decisions when it comes to our yard and a free tree." If he were buying a $200 tree we would talk about it, but if it is a free tree that he likes, he does not need permission from the "misses". I am thankful for the trust and honesty we have when it comes to money.
Would love to hear times when you have defending your spouse, friend, family, or visa versa.