Late night anxiety...

Last night I had a moment of anxiety. I thought to myself, "why are you not working?" And I work, just not the typical 40 hours a week. And especially right now, I don't work very much, and neither does Kenny. It's winter and we both work for a landscaping company, so there's not much landscaping in the winter. And if it snows we work. He plows and I help with the calls that come in about how their driveways weren't plowed.

But other than that we don't work much. And it has only been a week and a half. I'm not sure why it struck me the way it did, but I find myself questioning our entire lives.

Will we have enough money?

What if we want to adopt some day? Babies cost money.

What if our car breaks down or the furnace goes out?

Wouldn't it be great if we both worked full time?

Why am I not working full-time?

The crazy thing is is that Kenny and I planned and prepared and wanted to be where we are at. We didn't want to be working crazy schedules. We didn't want the overtime. We just wanted time to be together and time to rest.

What I'm saying is, a few months ago, I was working 40 hours a week and Kenny was working 50+ hours a week and our schedules didn't line up. We'd both get up at 6am for work, and I would get home at 2 or 3 and then have soccer practice from 6-7:30 every night. Kenny usually got home at 6 every night so we would miss each other in the chaos and by the time I got home at 7:45 we only had a precious few hours before we had to go to bed. We were making money, plenty of money for the two of us, but we missed each other and we missed having time to be in community with others. We were being drained. So we decided to make some changes. I gave up two part-time jobs, one of them being on the weekend so we could have every precious moment together. I cut back to 25 hours a week which gave me more time at home. Time to cook dinner for Kenny and make life in our home more restful during the times when we were together. Kenny still worked a lot, but we knew once December came around, things would slow down, and that they did.

Right now I only work part-time. Busy weeks its about 25-30 hours and slow weeks it's down to 12 hours. I have tons of time on my hands. I spend it going on walks with friends, playing cards with my grandma, meeting with teens, crafting, walking my dog, making dinner for Kenny, and numerous other things I had only dreamed that someday I'd have time for.

We have plenty of money in our savings, Dave Ramsey would be proud. We are making enough to get by until Kenny is working full-time again, and we are happier than ever. We have all the free time in the world, and yet we feel guilty and empty at times.

Why is it that the world makes me feel like I need to make money to feel worth? Why do I find it so hard to see the worth in the intangibles? Why is it when you finally reach a place in your life that you've only dreamt of, you want more?

I pray that I will be content in our life, that I will have peace about where we are at right now. That we will be able to enjoy this time together.

Channeling Martha Stewart

Tis the season to make cookies, fa la la la la la la la la. I've been craving sugar cookies, but had no desire to do the roll out kind. Too much work for right now. Once I decided to make sugar cookies, I realized I didn't have a go to recipe for them, so I went to none other than Martha Stewart. If Martha has a recipe, odds are it'll taste good. So I found a recipe for Giant Gooey Sugar Cookies. Below is the recipe along with directions.

Compliments of Ms. Martha Stewart


  • 2 cups all-purpose flour, spooned and leveled
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
  • 8 tablespoons (1 stick) unsalted butter, room temperature
  • 1 1/2 cups sugar, plus more for sprinkling
  • 1 large egg
  • 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
  • 1/4 cup sour cream


  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, salt, and baking soda; set aside.
  2. Using an electric mixer on medium-high, beat butter and sugar until light and fluffy, 2 to 4 minutes. Add egg and vanilla; beat well to combine.
  3. With mixer on low, add half the flour mixture, followed by sour cream, then remaining flour mixture; mix just until smooth. (Dough will be stiff; you may need to finish mixing it by hand with a wooden spoon.)
  4. Drop mounds of dough, each equal to about 3 tablespoons, 3 to 4 inches apart, onto two ungreased baking sheets; sprinkle with sugar. Bake until edges of cookies are just firm and tops are barely beginning to brown, 20 to 25 minutes, rotating sheets once halfway through. Transfer cookies to a rack to cool.

All of my ingredients
The mixing process

GIANT cookies, only 6 per cookie sheet

Voila! Mine looked very similar to Martha's, but I forgot to take a picture of the finished product.

Merry Christmas!!

Who I Love: My Husband

Kenny and I have been together for over 7 years!! We started dating in the fall of 2004 and on our first date we went and saw the movie "Saw", which was a terrible choice in hind sight. After the movie we sat in his jeep and talked for what seemed like forever. (Forever in a good way) The conversation was easy and I felt comfortable. Nothing was forced. It was as though we had been friends our whole life. From there we dated for what seemed like forever, but in reality it was 5 years. Since the early days of our relationship we had made a commitment to purity. It was not easy, especially for Kenny, but knowing that he respected me more than his desire for sex meant the world to me. After waiting 5 years we finally wed on July 24, 2009.

Since being married I have learned a lot about myself and I have learned what it means to be selfless and put Kenny first. It's not always easy, but it is worth it. Kenny is the love of my life. He makes me happier for being with him and I love him more today than yesterday. One thing I love about him is how comfortable and beautiful he makes me feel. He loves me just the way I am and he tells me just that. Not once have I felt insecure in his presence. He frequently tells me I'm beautiful and loved.

I will consider it an honor to grow old with him. He is my husband, the man who I choose to love everyday. The man I choose to honor and respect everyday of my life here on earth. I love you Kenny. Always and Forever.

"Life with you makes perfect sense, you're my best friend"

Olive Oil Bottles - Glass Etching

So it's been a while since I've posted any crafty things, but that doesn't mean I haven't been creating. My latest endeavor has been glass etching and I love it. The project I did was an olive oil bottle.
Things you need are glass, glass etching cream, a paint brush, and stencils (unless you are super confident in your painting skills, I am not)
First step is to tape on your stencils.
Second step is to start painting the etching cream into your stencils. Make sure to apply a thick layer. If not, you'll have to go back and reapply in certain areas. You'll want to follow the instructions on the bottle as to how long you need to leave the cream on.
After the required time, you rinse off all the cream and remove the stencils. This entire project takes under 15 minutes. The only downside is the etching cream is a little pricey. $12.99 at Michaels for that little bottle, but you don't use very much of it and I had a gift card. You can buy the glass bottles with tops already in, or you can use wine bottles and buy the tops from Bed Bath and Beyond or other stores with kitchen stuff.

Quotes Lately

Favorite Quotes Lately

As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler; solitude will not be solitude, poverty will not be poverty, nor weakness weakness.  ~Henry David Thoreau

Maybe a person's time would be as well spent raising food as raising money to buy food.  ~Frank A. Clark

Each day, awakening, are we asked to paint the sky blue? Need we coax the sun to rise or flowers to bloom? Need we teach birds to sing, or children to laugh, or lovers to kiss? No, though we think the world imperfect, it surrounds us each day with its perfections. We are asked only to appreciate them, and to show appreciation by living in peaceful harmony amidst them. The Creator does not ask that we create a perfect world; He asks that we celebrate it.  ~Robert Brault

Hans Hofmann – “The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.”